May 13, 2024
DHAKA – When we think of the trials and tribulations of pursuing a degree in higher education, a few elements might instinctually pop up in our minds. Sleepless nights spent poring over study materials, running around the campus to attend classes, lunches consisting of deep-fried snacks in lieu of proper meals to save time, lugging around backpacks that can put up a fair fight with your own body weight, foregoing social events to catch up on academics, and so on. However, when you add the concept of “motherhood” into this mix, the difficulties transcend into a whole new league.
Such was the experience of Tasfiah Tasnim Raya, an Economics student from Dhaka University (DU), who gave birth to her daughter during her second year. She shares, “Having a child during my second year of studies was full of significant challenges, especially during pregnancy when I experienced physical discomfort and fatigue. Balancing coursework with prenatal appointments and preparing for childbirth was hectic.”
Similar sentiments are echoed by Adiba Sultana*, who was pursuing her diploma from Bangabandhu Sheikh Mujib Medical University (BSMMU) during her pregnancy. Given how pregnancy has drastic physiological and psychological impacts on the mother’s body, juggling the pressures of academia can prove to be a herculean task. Adiba shares, “During pregnancy, I had gestational diabetes. I had to take insulin in the morning, afternoon, and nighttime. My morning classes were at 9 AM. A lot of times, I would just wake up and go to class without eating. Sometimes, I couldn’t take the insulin properly, or eat properly. Pregnancy is a stressful condition in itself. On top of that, I had exams, classes, and hospital duties. Everything combined led to a highly stressful journey.”
From the outside looking in, some might carry the belief that pregnancy might be the most arduous period of a mother’s life. While it may be true in a lot of cases, a large percentage of mothers might agree that a lot of hardships begin after their child is born. This can start right from the postpartum period, which causes tremendous stress on the mother’s body and mind, and can continue for almost two decades, as they ensure their children receive a solid upbringing. Consequently, being responsible for another human being, while recovering from the trauma of childbirth, in the midst of academic pursuits has the capacity to overwhelm just about anyone.
Shirin Afroja, a mother of two currently planning to pursue her postgraduate studies in Canada, shares, “After I had my first son during my undergraduate years, I had to take a semester gap for recovery. Doing simple activities like walking up stairs was difficult without help sometimes. Apart from the physical recovery, I had to focus on mental recovery as well. I was very emotionally overwhelmed for the first few months. No one talked to me about the emotional side of things, so I was a bit unprepared. So, I decided a semester gap would be the best option for me to focus on my baby as well as my own recovery.”
While it is already difficult to pursue academics while navigating motherhood, re-entering the education system after taking a gap can prove to be quite daunting as well.
Regarding her own experience from both sides, Shirin says, “After I had my son during my undergrad years, I took a semester off. When I returned, I had to make sure my classes did not extend too late into the day. I also had to make sure someone could look after my baby when I was attending classes, and my aunt and mother really helped here, which was very fortunate for me. Now that I am planning to move abroad with two young kids, I know it will be very challenging because I will lack a lot of familial support. Apart from that, I think another struggle will be to adjust to the pressure that comes with the pursuit of a Master’s degree while maintaining my family, but I am fortunate that my partner is supportive regarding this.”
When navigating the trials of motherhood, familial support cannot be understated. This can allow the mothers to not only focus on their education but also give them the chance to take care of themselves alongside their children. This is exemplified by Tasfiah, who shares, “In my current situation, managing my third year of studies alongside caring for my daughter requires careful time management and support from my family. I’m continuing my education despite the challenges and also prioritising self-care by going to the gym, hanging out with my friends, painting, and so on. In this whole journey, my family and my husband have been great sources of support.”
Raising children truly does take a village. However, having an entire support system composed solely of family members in this day and age may not be sufficient. In that case, the concept of a “village” shouldn’t just end with familial ties. Educational institutions can be considered to be a part of the community, where mothers are encouraged to further their academic pursuits without having to give them up to raise their children or compromise their health.
When asked what changes educational institutions can make in order to support mothers, Adiba said, “Institutions should first focus on improving their sanitation facilities. Additionally, they should also improve the mass transportation systems as well. Institutions should also try to change their negative perspectives of mothers as students and ensure that the students also form an encouraging environment.”
To compound this, Tasfiah adds, “To support these incredible women, we need to implement flexible class schedules, offer online courses, and help to create support networks tailored to the mothers’ needs. By doing so, we can enable mothers to pursue their education without sacrificing their family responsibilities.”